Missing my Grandpapa...

I miss my Grandpapa. I have so many fond memories of him from when I was a little girl. As I got older, into my twenties and thirties, I didn't see him much. In fact, when he died five years ago I hadn't seen him in over ten years. I have regrets. I wish I would have spent more time with him. He was an amazing man. I miss him dearly. All I have left is my memories and his obituary.

 

 

RANDOLPH, Roger, 75, passed unexpectedly January 19, 2009. Forty five year resident of Tampa, where he and his wife, JoAnn, raised their seven children. He was a U.S. Army Korean War Veteran, where he served as a Second Lieutenant. He was an avid sports fan & fisherman. He was devoted brother of the Pi Kappa Phi Fraternity at Florida State University where he recently received the Golden Legion Certificate. He received a BA from the University of South Florida. Retired from General Cable Corporation after nearly 30 years. Realtor for over 20 years with Prudential Tropical Realty. He was preceded in death by his son, Robb. He is survived by his loving wife of 46 years, JoAnn; sons, Peter and Craig Randolph; daughters, Angela Randolph, Laura Johnson, Julia Tiberi, Lynn Randolph-Franzen; brother, Ray Randolph; and fifteen grandchildren. The funeral service will be held 4 pm Friday, January 23, 2009 at the Blount & Curry Funeral Home-Carrollwood Chapel, 3207 W. Bearss Avenue, Tampa. The family will receive friends 2 hours prior to the service. Private internment later. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that contributions may be made to the Roger Randolph Foundation, at any Bank of America branch. The Foundation is established to promote academic and athletic excellence in youth.
To make a contribution, please send to:

Bank of America
Roger Randolph Foundation
c/o Westshore Mall
100 N. Westshore Blvd.
Tampa, Fl. 33609

 

I was scrolling through my newsfeed on Facebook and saw a post about an awesome obituary that a man wrote himself: http://twentytwowords.com/read-this-grandpas-funny-self-written-obituary-and-then-go-be-kind-to-someone-in-his-name/. The man was also a veteran of the Korean War and it made me think of my Grandpapa Roger.  I like the end of the obituary and I think my Grandpapa would have liked it too.

 

"Instead of flowers, Walt would hope that you would do an unexpected and unsolicited act of kindness for some poor unfortunate soul in his name."


I love you Grandpapa. Can't wait to see you again on the other side. <3

Bliss!

Okay so I’m going to start with a little disclaimer. This post is a little unorthodox, even for me. But this is REAL. My relationship with God and myself is ever evolving and changing. And I continue to find myself WAY OUTSIDE the religious box. Bliss!

I had a cool dream the night before last. I have felt so much peace and joy in my soul ever since.

It was kind of bizarre like dreams usually are. But the neat thing is that I actually had a dream! I can’t tell you the last time I had a dream, or remembered having a dream.

In the dream I was on an intertube, near a pier, at the river, not really sure which. I was surrounded by a bunch of people I love, people I’ve known throughout my life, but I don’t remember which ones exactly. The funny thing is I remember us all taking communion. And we used white bread and grape juice, not that fussy stuff you get in church. Lol.

Another cool thing I remember is that there was awesome music playing. Old stuff, like the stuff I grew up listening to, Simon & Garfunkle, The Band, Van Morrison. And I was happy. So happy.

Then I woke up with this song in my head...

Oh, the water
Oh, the water
Oh, the water
Let it run all over me

And it stoned me to my soul
Stoned me just like Jelly Roll
And it stoned me
Stoned me just like going home
And it stoned me

Wow! I just love Van. In the song he gets caught in a rain storm and just appreciates how good the rain feels. The moment!

A great reminder for me. To live in the moment. To appreciate all the little things. To stop getting caught up in the rat race, myself and my crazy head.

Things like...

Nature. Fellowship. Music.

All things that bring me peace and joy and bring me closer to God.

Bliss!

Speak LOVE.

 

I’m always grateful when I stumble on something positive that came out of something negative.

After the Miley Cyrus VMA debacle, I happened to read this great article The Dear Miley Aftermath on a blog by a 27 year old kindred spirit named Rihanna. The title of her blog is LOVE. The headline is Romans 12:11: “Never be lacking in passion.” I’m intrigued.

I go on to read that she has overcome many challenges in her life, namely an eating disorder, and that she has done it through an intimate, passionate relationship with God. She shares on her blog a list of affirmations she spoke over herself for a full year that completely transformed her life and empowered her recovery. I began speaking them over myself and will be using them from this day forward for the next year. I am ready to be transformed even more! From glory to glory Lord!

“You will decree a thing and it will be established for you and a light will shine on your ways.”  –Job 22:28

I AM…

Beautiful. Jesus is enthralled by my beauty. People see the beauty of Jesus when they look at me.

Worthy. Jesus made me worthy of love and all good things. I am worth getting to know, befriending, loving and keeping.

More Than A Conqueror. I am strong. I was put here for such a time as this, for a purpose. God is stirring a new strength in me for the world around me.

A New Creation. The old me has passed away and the Lord is making me great and powerful.

God’s Favored.  God awaited the day I was born. Every day is a new adventure. He fought long and hard for my heart and He longs for all of me.

A friend of God. God speaks to me every day and I am able to recognize His voice. I have a deep, intimate relationship with the Father.

A friend of people. People are naturally attracted to me and I am deserving of good friends.

Irreplaceable.  I am the only one who has ever had my calling. God has equipped me to accomplish my dreams, calling and destiny.

“Words satisfy the mind as much as fruit does the stomach – words kill; words give life; they’re either poison or fruit – you choose.”   –Proverbs 18:20-21

I choose life. I choose LOVE… of God, myself and others. <3

You Are Valuable

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

You are valuable. Others may not treat you as such, but that in no way diminishes the fact that you are truly and undeniably valuable.

You are valuable, and nothing that anyone else can do or say will ever take that value away. The value of your life is yours to hide from or to ignore if you choose, or to live with magnificent fulfillment.

Your thoughts and opinions are valuable. The more they are challenged, tested and refined, the more valuable they become. Your interests, passions and experiences are valuable. Even your disappointments and limitations have much positive value because of the learning and perspective they provide.

You are valuable, and it is your unique challenge in every moment to fulfill that value. Though it is much easier to pretend that you have no value, what is easiest is not what is best.

For ultimately, life is considerably more rich and more rewarding, more filled with joy and real meaning, when you live true to the value that is you. Know that you are indeed valuable, and let that value shine.

— Ralph Marston

Let the world know us by our love.

I saw this brilliant post by NewSpring Church on Facebook today and loved it so much I had to share!

Jesus made it clear in John 13:34-35 how the world would know we are His disciples.

Notice that He did NOT say:

They will know you are my disciples…

By the way you forward really stupid, ridiculous emails (or Facebook posts) to one another…and if you refuse to forward them to everyone you have in your contact list, then you don’t love me.

By the way you yell at people who don’t know me for living as if they don’t know me.

By your T-shirts and bumper stickers!

By the music you listen to!

By the political party you support.

By the denomination you belong to.

By the way you protest.

By the products and companies you boycott.

By the way you look down on those whom you perceive aren’t as good as you.

By the way you take from one another!

Nope! John 13:34-35 is clear. Jesus didn’t mix His Words. We are called to live this out.

John 13:34-35 says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Love is the key. It is the greatest command. It is the highest form of wisdom there is.

Father, I pray: Let the world know us by our love.

That's What Fathers Do

 


First of all, I must say it feels really good to be back! It has been over a month since I've written in my journal and nearly three months since I've posted to this blog.

Yesterday I came home from work early. I'd been feeling ill for a couple days so I resigned myself to come home and go straight to bed to give my body some much needed rest. I don't always take the best care of myself. Even now. I have a habit of go, go, going until I can't go anymore.

Well when I woke up this morning I felt slightly better. I got out of bed and looked out the window to see what the weather was like. Overcast and gloomy. Hmmm... I think I'll get back in bed and stay there all day.

Well after having the most amazing quiet time, I was suddenly inspired to write! As soon as the pen hit the paper, it was like healing salve for my soul. Why had I stayed away for so long!? Illness, bad weather, whatever. Whatever it takes to slow me down enough that I get alone and still with God and let Him revive me - physically, mentally and spiritually - with a pen in my hand. I am grateful.

“The root of worry and fear is an orphan spirit.”*

I've been reflecting on this a lot since my pastor said it last Sunday. Not only does it make me extremely grateful for my life transformation since returning to my Father, but it makes me think of those passages in the Bible where Jesus talks about the little children.

“...whoever humbles himself like this child...” {Matthew 18:1-4}

“Let the children come to me and do not hinder them...'” {Mark 10:13-15}

When I read these I always tear up. I picture Jesus sitting down in His robe and sandalled feet and a little child climbing into His lap.

I am that little child.

It makes me think of this line from that song by Josh Garrels, Children of the Earth:

“The older we become, we must become more like a child”

This is one of the many paradoxes I have found to be true in my own spiritual growth. When I was out there on my own and didn't want anything to do with the Father who loved me, I was alone and scared to death. I was selfish and insecure. I did not trust. I was stumbling around in darkness. I was lost.

But when I returned to my Father, He began to transform me...
“from a restless slave into a trusting child.”*

Trusting in Him has changed everything! My life is a lot simpler today but it actually has purpose and meaning for the first time. I am no longer living a selfish and lonely existence. I am secure for the first time.

Secure in my Father's love. And His will for me.

And when the old worries, doubts and fears creep in ...which they often do... I return to the beginning:  SURRENDER.  I live life one day at a time now. And I'm constantly having to turn my life and my will back over to Him, the One who loves me.

Because I am His child and He knows what's best for me. He takes care of me.

That's what fathers do. 

*Josh Lipscomb